Are you sick of your man telling lies all the time? He lies about “working late” when he really went out with the guys for a beer. He lies about what he really wants and how he really feels.
He lies so easily about trivial things that you start to wonder if he lies about bigger things as well.
It’s an age-old question that women all over the world ask: “why do men lie?” Men lie for a variety of reasons, and some are the very same reasons women lie. In actuality, we all lie at times, so don’t be too hard on your man just yet.
Let’s take a look at some of the most common reasons men lie to women so you can start to understand ways to create more open and honest communication in your relationship.
1. To Avoid Drama
Have you have ever gotten upset and reacted dramatically when you’re man told you the truth about how he felt or what he wanted from the relationship?
Would you be surprised to learn that now your man just sugarcoats things and tells you what you want to hear to avoid facing more drama?
Men quickly learn to adapt their behavior to keep the peace. If he can tell a little white lie to avoid drama and make his life easier, why would he ever want to tell you the truth?
If there’s no perceived upside to telling you the truth in a given situation, why would a man want to be honest? This is true of both men and women when it comes lying. We all just want to make things easier for ourselves.
2. To Avoid Getting Caught
Nobody wants to get caught doing something they know they shouldn’t and have to face the music. This is human nature and it’s true of both men and women.
However, men have a particular way of twisting things around and putting the blame on you. He’ll pull out all the excuses in the book and swear he just didn’t want to hurt your feelings. However, this is usually man-speak for he really didn’t want to deal with your anger after you busted him.
If you catch your man doing something shady, the reality is that he would not have done it in the first place if he didn’t want to hurt your feelings. He lied because he wanted to save his own skin, plain and simple.
3. To Get Out Of Doing Things
Men will lie to get out of doing undesirable tasks, such as household chores or errands. If you ask your man to pick up a few groceries on his way home from work, he might suddenly have to stay late.
Or maybe he conveniently forgets to do things, because he knows you’ll end up doing it yourself. Why do those pesky chores when he knows you’ll end up doing them for him?
Men don’t like any sort of pressure to do things they don’t want to do. The more pressure you put on them, the more they accuse you of nagging.
It is wise to choose your battles and bring up those pesky tasks on the honey do list at a time when your man is relaxed and feeling stress-free.
4. Past Conditioning From Old Girlfriends
Sometimes men have had negative experiences with their exes and have been conditioned to lie to avoid drama.
For example, if a man always got flack from his ex-girlfriend for spending too much time with the guys, he might have become accustomed to lying about it.
So now, he might tell you he’s staying late at the office when he’s really going out for happy hour with his friends.
In this case, he’s lying because the woman that came before you made his life difficult every time he told the truth about where he was.
5. He’s Insecure
Sometimes men lie simply because they are insecure about the truth. They want to impress you so they put up a front. They think if you knew the truth, you would no longer be interested in them.
Men who are insecure might lie about their age or their jobs. They might put up ten-year-old pictures on their online profiles back when they had hair and were fifteen pounds thinner.
It’s natural for everyone to experience some insecurity, but lying about yourself is not the best way to build a relationship. An insecure man who lies about trivial things is much more likely to lie about more important things.
How To Have More Open And Honest Communication In Your Relationship
Now that we’ve looked at some of the most common reasons men lie to women, here is how to get your man to start being more truthful.
The best way to encourage a man to be honest is to make him feel safe to do so. It’s one thing to say you won’t get mad or create drama, but do your actions live up to your promises?
From now on, make an effort to stay calm and express your feelings in a constructive way the next time you get upset by something your man says. Don’t make his life miserable just for being honest about something.
Once your man knows you can handle honesty and not bring the drama or punish him for it, he’s going to start opening up and be more truthful with you.
Please leave a comment below to share your personal experiences or let us know why you think men lie.