Have you ever found yourself wondering, “Why doesn’t he compliment me anymore?” Ask yourself one question before you start throwing the blame at your man. Do you suck at taking a compliment?
I’ve got to admit that I’m guilty of this myself. I’ve always been really bad at accepting praise of any kind. If you compliment what I’m wearing, I’ll downplay it and say “Oh I got this for $10 at Target.”
Why do we women feel the need to deflect compliments like someone is hurling an awful insult at us?
Case in point, check out this “Compliments” sketch by Amy Schumer, featuring a group of female friends giving and deflecting compliments. Not only is it hilarious, but it’s also pretty enlightening.
Ok so now that you’ve had a good laugh, take a cue from the last lady in the video and next time someone gives you a compliment, try responding with a simple “Thank you!”
And if that video isn’t enough to open your eyes, try looking at it from the compliment giver’s perspective. When people give you a compliment, they are sharing their genuine opinion. When you deflect it, you are basically telling them they were wrong.
If someone tells you your hair looks good, and you say, “Really, I’m having such a bad hair day,” wouldn’t that kind of make the other person feel stupid? So in reality, deflecting compliments is actually kind of rude.
Now think about it from your man’s perspective. If you have a history of deflecting his compliments, why would he want to keep getting rejected? It would be a lot safer to not say anything at all.
If you want your man to start complimenting you again, try asking for his opinion on something every now and then and make sure to smile and say thank you whenever he compliments you.
About Adrienne Mansfield
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